Memes About Emotions



Detached from strong feelings


Shame and embarrassment

Emotional lability
My PDA emotions
Empathy

Honesty

Praise

Promises

Emotional effects of Demand Avoidance

Responsibility

Shame

Self-doubt


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Internalised PDA - the quieter, but equally impactful presentation of PDA that's hard for people to spot

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This blog article is also available as an animated video: click here to view it PDA research & writing has focused on externalised, freely-expressed presentations of PDA.   However, internalised PDA is often completely missed because our meltdowns are concealed and demands tend to be avoided subtly, and we slip below the radar. We internalisers though are not "less" PDA. Just like an iceberg isn’t smaller than a same-sized lump of ice on dry land: the iceberg merely looks smaller because the majority of its body is hidden from view under the water. Internalising PDAers’ driving forces are just as strong as those that drive externalising PDAers, and can lead to self-harm, dropping out of school & employment, and even suicidal ideation. I believe that internalised PDA needs to be brought into the radar. As we’re so good at concealing our traits, it takes internalisers like me to signpost people to our quieter, less accessible half of the little-explored PDA continent. T
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Internalised PDA

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What do we mean by internalised and externalised PDA? To understand what internalised and externalised PDA are, I think it’s first necessary to understand what PDA is. PDA stands for both a specific type of irrational, “pathological” type of avoidance, and the distinct neurotype it belongs to. PDA-style avoidance is only experienced by people fitting the PDA neurotype. PDA as a neurotype involves more traits than the irrational avoidance it’s named for: ~ massive need for personal control ~ ultra-high inborn anxiety ~ interest in fantasy and role-play ~ using social strategies to avoid every day demands (like having to put shoes on) ~ enjoying novelty PDA, as a neurotype, hasn’t been studied much. The huge majority of existing studies have focused on children with obvious traits: I.E., children who’ve kicked and screamed publicly enough for researchers to notice them.  But there are more PDAers than children who’ve stood out as obviously difficult. Many of us, for example, are adults.
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The F family of 7 adrenaline responses

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Most people have likely heard of the Fight, Flight, Freeze trio of adrenaline responses, but there are four more F responses which are less well-known: Flop, Fawn, Funster and Fib. I think knowledge of all seven F responses is important in relation to PDA (the pathological demand avoidance neurotype) because we PDAers are naturally prone to ultra-high anxiety. Our naturally high anxiety causes adrenaline to keep on pumping through our systems to trigger these responses. It may seem to casual observers that our F reactions are baseless and/or contrived to attract attention, but the underlying reality is that these behaviours are driven by blind panic, and we have no control over them. So let's explore them one by one: Fight is, perhaps, the easiest F response for people to grasp, because triggered adrenaline causes visible aggression. Happiful.com describe the Fight response as "Your muscles tense, you start to sweat, your heart beats faster – you act on impulse to save and
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