Sally Cat PDA

This blog article explores polyvagal theory in conjunction with PDA (pathological demand avoidance), and includes definitions for readers who aren't unfamiliar with terms used.  It explores how polyvagal theory can explain extreme demand avoidance, but not all of PDA. Those who are familiar with PDA, may have heard mentions of polyvagal theory in relation to it, but have struggled to make sense of it. This was my starting point when I came to write this. I felt polyvagal theory was something I *should* know, but felt helplessly demand avoidant against reading up on (such is the nature of avoidance of the PDA kind). Thankfully, my desire to understand polyvagal theory eventually out-weighed my avoidance, and I approached Libby Hill of Smalltalk Speech and Language Therapy who specialises in PDA, situational mustism and polyvagal theory. More thankfully still, she agreed to co-author this article. It's an honour to collaborate with her because it was she who first alerted me to ...

What do we mean by internalised and externalised PDA? To understand what internalised and externalised PDA are, I think it’s first necessary to understand what PDA is. PDA stands for both a specific type of irrational, “pathological” type of avoidance, and the distinct neurotype it belongs to. PDA-style avoidance is only experienced by people fitting the PDA neurotype. PDA as a neurotype involves more traits than the irrational avoidance it’s named for: ~ massive need for personal control ~ ultra-high inborn anxiety ~ interest in fantasy and role-play ~ using social strategies to avoid every day demands (like having to put shoes on) ~ enjoying novelty PDA, as a neurotype, hasn’t been studied much. The huge majority of existing studies have focused on children with obvious traits: I.E., children who’ve kicked and screamed publicly enough for researchers to notice them.  But there are more PDAers than children who’ve stood out as obviously difficult. Many of us, for example, are adul...

This blog article is also available as an animated video: click here to view it PDA research & writing has focused on externalised, freely-expressed presentations of PDA.   However, internalised PDA is often completely missed because our meltdowns are concealed and demands tend to be avoided subtly, and we slip below the radar. We internalisers though are not "less" PDA. Just like an iceberg isn’t smaller than a same-sized lump of ice on dry land: the iceberg merely looks smaller because the majority of its body is hidden from view under the water. Internalising PDAers’ driving forces are just as strong as those that drive externalising PDAers, and can lead to self-harm, dropping out of school & employment, and even suicidal ideation. I believe that internalised PDA needs to be brought into the radar. As we’re so good at concealing our traits, it takes internalisers like me to signpost people to our quieter, less accessible half of the little-explored PDA continent. T...

PDA, which stands for "pathological demand avoidance" is a neurotype (life-long neurological difference) which matches criteria for autism spectrum diagnosis because it entails rigid thinking (our demand avoidance) and social communication & interaction issues. Empirical evidence for PDA is lacking, and there's an army of critics saying PDA doesn't qualify as a distinct neurotype. Some argue that PDA is a trauma response that any autistic person can experience. These arguments fail to acknowledge that PDA, as a neurotype, is more than its trait of "pathological" (AKA inborn and involuntary) demand avoidance. "PDA" refers to both our demand avoidance trait and our entire neurotype, which has the additional traits of people-focus; high anxiety; personal control-need; and propensity for fantasy & role-play. People who directly experience PDA, either because they're PDA themselves (like me), or because they have a family member  who's P...